my proper blog is at http://autumn-leaf16.livejournal.com/

I must mention, the wavering clock is a series of one shots that are not not connected together at all. They are all completely separated from each other.

Summary: an alternative interpretation on why Chitose quit just before the semi-final. Watanabe/Shiraishi, with one sided Chitose/Shiraishi.

Author’s Note: It’s quite funny but the first Watanabe/Shiraishi fan fiction that I wrote is totally one-sided, while the next one is less one-sided, but it is still sort of one sided. So maybe this is why I wrote this one- I probably secretly want to write a proper one. (ie. Where the feeling become mutal.)
I guess this is my apology fan fic to Watanabe (laugh). For the longest time I didn’t like him as I blame him for not having stopped Shiraishi from playing his perfect tennis, but then I realized something: do we actually have prove that Watanabe didn’t help Shiraishi at all? Cause maybe he actually told Shiraishi it is more important to have fun but Shiraishi still decided to play perfect tennis. And then at the other day, when I was writing a Shiraishi/OC fan fiction, I suddenly realized this: Shiraishi has a tendency of (in my opinion) bottling things up, as his team mates doesn’t really know that he doesn’t like his perfect tennis, so it is possible that Watanabe didn’t know at all.

Written: October 20, 2007


After Shitenhouji’s glorious win of 3-0 in the quarter finals of the nationals, the boys were allowed to have some free time before they started to prepare for tomorrow. Chitose, Gin and Kenya decided to use this time to talk to their acquaintance in other schools, while the rest were just mucking around outside their lodging.
But Chitose was to find four of his team mates running around the nearby court after he returned from talking with Tachibana.
“What are you guys doing?”
Shitenhouji’s infamous doubles answered by releasing a sigh of great suffering before they pushed Zaizen forward.
“Hey, it was not my fault!” the second year immediately protested. “I would never have knocked the can of coke over if I wasn’t trying to escape from the two of you.”
“Zaizen spilt coke on Shiraishi’s scarf.” Kintarou, the only one who was actually cheerful, explained.
“’That’ scarf?” Chitose asked, beginning to understand why this was happening.
“What else would make him do this?” Yuuji pointed out dryly.
Shiriashi started to wear a plain white scarf for ever single day of the winter in his second year of school, and he continued to take the scarf almost every where with him in the other seasons by putting it in his tennis bag.
Rumours naturally spread but no one has discovered the truth as Shiraishi told anyone who asked that he would say no to every single question.
“Where is he anyway? I need to talk to him.”
“He went to wash his scarf.” Koharu said. “If you see him then please try to persuade him to not kill us since he says that we can only stop when Kintarou stops.”
“Isn’t he being punished along with you guys?”
“No, he just want to run with us as he thinks this is fun,” Yuuji said in a tone that was on the verge of being labelled as great despair. “Shiraishi then had that brilliant idea of making him supervise us.”
This was not a small matter, as Kintarou actually ran all the way from Shizuhouka to Tokyo…

Shiraishi’s temporary room reflected his personality quite well: it was relatively tidy with one or two objects not in the right place as the reminder that he did not want to be a perfectionist.
But the owner of the room was absent, and Chitose was quite disappointed at this because each passing second was decreasing his courage. It didn’t really matter when he chooses to confess to Shiraishi, but it was best to do it now, because this was the day before the semi final.
Shitenhouji was eliminated at the semi-final of last year’s national, just like Shishigaku. But Chitose felt that Shiraishi differed from him greatly by being rather obsessed with his wish of letting the team go beyond this position.
This was why he wanted to let Shiraishi know what he now felt, so he could be the one to comfort him if he was unable to achieve his dream.
Upon hearing the approaching footstep he smiled and was going to announce his presence by opening the door when he suddenly heard Shiraishi’s voice. His hand quickly dropped due to the realization that Shiraishi would not be alone, as his friend was never the type of person who had a tendency of talking to himself.
Chitose did not want another person to even see him here as his hasty departure or request of speaking to Shiraishi alone would be too suspicious. While he was certain that Shiraishi would act as if nothing had happened if he could not accept him, another might not be able to keep quiet.
Since he was unable to come up with a good excuse of why he was here fast enough, he did the only other way of evasion that he could think of.
He hid in the closet, this could be interpreted as a rather wise move as he was able to see what happened in the room due to a crack in the door of the unused furniture.
“Don’t worry, Kuranosuke,” the use of first name by their coach did not really surprise him as Watanabe has done this before without either explanation or warning. “This stain will be easily erased by bleach.”
Shiraishi was carrying a bunch of papers that was probably their coach’s paper work, while Watanabe was examining the slightly wet scarf. Chitose could almost understand why Shiraishi was so angry: the dark stain was very obvious on the white wool.
He suddenly frowned- has there been a time when Shiraishi actually allowed anyone to hold his precious scarf before?
“I hope so.” Shiraishi muttered as he sat down on the bed. “I really can’t believe them! What were they thinking by putting coke right above my bag? Although I probably shouldn’t have left it unzipped in the first place, but still…”
“I will buy you a new one if it doesn’t wash off.” Watanabe promised, his tone unusually gentle and tender.
“But it wouldn’t be the same.” Shiraishi complained, the usually mature buchou almost sounded as if he was pouting. “It wouldn’t be your first present to me.”
It was clear that this was not a normal conversation between a coach and his student, but Chitose still fervently hoped that he was wrong as it would hurt too much to fail before you even tried.
“Then it is good that I didn’t just give you a cake.” Saying so, Watanabe sat down beside him and looped the scarf around him before he tugged it very lightly in order to make Shiraishi rest his head on his lap, completely discarding the boy’s protest of how dangerous doing this was.
“Being alone with you in my room is suspicious enough.”
“We’ll just say that we are discussing paper work, or I can escape by jumping out from the window.”
“You can be so childish sometimes.” Shiraishi teased as he leant against Watanabe, his happy smile reflecting what he felt for the older man.
“As I told you on that day, thirteen years is not always that big a gap.” Watanabe replied. His left hand was clasped with Shiraishi’s bandaged one, while his other hand was playing with Shiraishi’s hair in a very intimate fashion. “How do you feel about tomorrow?”
“Quite nervous at being the first to play, yet very glad that I finally get to have a game. By the way, what will the order for the last match be?”
“That depend on our opponent, but I promise that you will get to play no matter what happens.”
“Are you letting your feelings make your judgement?”
“I often think that things would be better for you if I had let my personal emotions affect my decisions.” At this point, a bitterness actually crept into the usually cheerful voice. “I should never have let you be the buchou in your second year… at the very least I should have prevented you from playing perfect tennis.”
“None of it is your fault.” Shiraishi said firmly, raising his free hand to stroke Watanabe’s face. “I would probably have made the same mistakes as I wouldn’t have understood. Even worse, I might have resented you for stopping me doing something that I wished to do at that time.”
“But I will certainly be very relieved when you stop playing your perfect tennis, because it is not easy for me to hear all these praises of you being perfect.”
“Only in tennis! You actually get jealous?”
“Insecure, not jealous. But don’t you think it is unfair that I, the one you choose, can not openly declare this?”
“You sound as if I have a lot of people confessing to me all the time when you are the only who have done so.” At this Shiraishi laughed, as he was recollecting how he managed to end up being loved by his coach. “I am really glad that you did although I got quite a fright as I never thought that such a thing would happen.”
Chitose had to clench his hands together to prevent himself from yelling out aloud, or banging on the wood in order to release his anger. It sounded as if Shiraishi only ended up loving Watanabe after learning of the other’s affection for him. Would it be possible for him to be in the position he so desired if he had made up him mind earlier?
Shiraishi suddenly sat up and placed his arms around Watanabe, before he kissed him on the lips with both longing and passion- what Chitose himself desired to do greatly.
“Alright, now we have to go.” Shiraishi said firmly when he broke free from the other’s tight embrace.
“Can’t you at least say my name once?” Watanabe protested, grabbing Shiraishi’s hand.
“That is too dangerous as I know that I’ll make the mistake of addressing you that way in front of everyone else. But there is less then a year left before we can stop meeting in secret. It isn’t long!”
“Yet I am not sure if I want this year to end.” Watanabe commented out slowly. “Because I probably wouldn’t get to see you every single day.”
His words made the young boy laugh and slip his arms around his neck once more, finding himself unable to return to being a normal student yet due to what he just heard.
This also convinced Chitose that Shiraishi really felt what Watanabe felt, he was with the older man because he loved him, or at the very least feeling an emotion very akin to love.

“You want to quit the tennis club right now?” Watanabe asked with a frown, not aware that he was one of the two that caused Chitose’s to make this decision.
Chitose simply gave a nod before he muttered out his excuse of wanting to see everything in a different angle by not being in the team.
The real reason was that he could not bear to stay in the club anymore.
He should be glad that Shiraishi was happy but he couldn’t help but to feel a deep pain as he was not the one who could let the person he care about so much to be happy by merely being beside him.
“Without even telling your team mates?” Watanabe continued, examining the form in his hand with a slight hint of distaste.
“I think it is best as they won’t be able to understand…” he muttered.
He was like Kintarou by being a new comer among the already closely knitted regulars, but they accepted him completely, treating him as if he had been with them ever since they all first met. And their condemnation would hurt, especially when Shiraishi’s reproach would be the strongest due to his position of being the buchou.
But to watch Shiraishi smile at another was a much more painful thing.

Author’s Note: Initially, this was just going to be a random one shot showing Watanabe and Shiraishi together being cute, so all I had planned was the scarf incident. But then I suddenly had the idea of making Chitose be in this too, and I don’t know why but I don’t really like Chitose/Shiraishi pairing, and I don’t think this is because I don’t really like Chitose. I don’t like Fuji that much but I quite like reading Shiraishi/Fuji fan fictions.

But as for the overall title, I got that idea from this story. It’s ‘The wavering clock’ as it plays on the idea of how the two of them (or just Watanabe, depending on the context) sort of want and don’t want this year to end. Because even though Watanabe loving Shiraishi is illegal, he get to see Shiraishi ever day, which he might not be able to do once Shiraishi is no longer in Shitenhouji.

Lastly, what Shiraishi feels for Watanabe, what happened is that Watanabe loves Shiraishi and so he told him, Shiraishi is unsure but he liked Watanabe so he agreed to being with him. And then, after some time he ended up loving Watanabe back. So basically what Chitose said is right.

It’s funny as this series can actually be categorized as romance based, unlike my oc fic with Shiraishi, although I think it is because I am using that one to focus and examine his character.



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autumnleaf16

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